The Truth About Couples Therapy

In the last year, our practice has seen a dramatic increase in the number of couples who are reaching out for therapy. I think this speaks to many things.

First, a growing awareness of mental health and a recognition of the benefits of therapy for relationship health in addition to individual health. We are seeing changing relationship expectations as societal norms evolve and the continued hangover from the pandemic.

There's a growing trend toward being proactive about relationship maintenance instead of waiting until a relationship is in crisis. As a result, more couples are seeking therapy as a way to strengthen their connection and prevent future problems, acknowledging that it's not easy to be in a long-term partnership and that needing help is normal. #WeAllStruggle

There are still a few misconnections though that are worth addressing should you or someone you love be considering couples counselling.

One of the biggest misconceptions about couples therapy is that it’s a last resort for relationships on the brink of collapse. In reality, the sooner the better, as people often come in way too late. Our work together is usually far more effective the sooner you come.

Here are a few other facts about couples counselling:

The Therapist Won’t Get Your Partner to Change
A common expectation is that a therapist will fix the other person’s flaws. However, therapy isn't about changing your partner but about understanding yourself, your needs and one another's needs better. We help guide couples to explore their own behaviours, reactions and feelings, helping them to develop empathy and create healthier interaction patterns.

You'll Delve Deeply Into Your Own Issues
Couples therapy isn’t just about resolving joint issues; it’s also about individual growth. Each partner will have the opportunity to explore their own emotional landscape, discovering how their personal experiences, traumas and beliefs affect the relationship. This self-awareness is crucial for meaningful change and relationship improvement.

You Might Laugh, Kiss, and Snuggle in Front of us
Therapy sessions aren’t always serious and intense. They can also be moments of joy, connection and softer moments. Sharing laughs, affection and positive experiences in therapy helps reinforce the bond between partners and reminds them of the love and joy that brought them together in the first place.

No Matter What Happens, You Will Grow and learn new skills 
Regardless of the challenges faced or the outcome of the relationship, both partners will gain insights, learn new skills, and develop a deeper understanding of themselves and each other. This growth can lead to stronger, more resilient relationships or, in some cases, an amicable and healthy separation if that’s what’s best for both individuals.

Relationships require constant effort & active engagement
I have always loved this quote from popular author Esther Perel. Her perspective encourages us to acknowledge the potential for loss so that we are motivated to invest in our relationships with intention and presence, revitalizing the passion and connection that can sometimes wane over time. Therapy can support this process. Therapy is for everyone building a;  partnership and we are humbled if you choose our team to help!