News Flash: Difficulties in a sexual relationship are usually a common symptom of a greater problem
Many clients come to see me for sex therapy thinking they can work on their sex life in isolation of their relationship. The issue with this is any change will often be temporary. Physical intimacy is almost always connected to an emotional intimacy issue. Often people have to first work on the other areas in their relationship and improve the way they communicate and connect first. There are no shortcuts to making your partner horny.
Funny enough, even people comfortable having sex are not comfortable talking about sex. Talking about sex looks like both partners sharing insecurities and asking for what they want sexuallySharing the pain of being rejected sexually; we all need to be wanted and to have sex initiated from our partners at times. Often only one person is the initiator.
What we almost always work on in therapy is the practice of being vulnerable. We connect with others the most when we open up about our biggest discomforts and insecurities. My role is to help you talk about it without blaming or shaming each other and learning how to provide validation to one another. When we feel validated and understood, we create emotional intimacy and this is a turn on. We all have sexual insecurities and we need to know that they make sense to our partners and that we are lovable and desired in spite of them.
Many couples carry these insecurities without ever sharing them with their partner and then their assumptions and fears can become true. My work with you is to open up the conversation to turn your shame into connection. We all need to feel accepted by our partners for who we are deep below the surface to feel safe. This is a relaxed, non anxious present state that is felt, you know you're not alone and you trust you won't be rejected, abandoned or hurt.
Reach out to us if you would like to work on you SEXUAL CONNECTION. Let's BE REAL TOGETHER
~ Laura, Clinical Therapist Call (506) 651-1239 or BOOK ONLINE