Boost Your Mood with Two Simple Tools: Human Connection & Self-Compassion
After all these rainy and cold grey days we have had recently, I have been noticing a negative impact on my mood. I often revisit a few simple tools when I am feeling this way.
Human Connection..... a powerful tool for resilience and improved mood. It can be hard to fight a strong pull to isolate ourselves when we are feeling down. It can feel exhausting or even overwhelming to be around others.
We know that when we surround ourselves with good quality, safe connection, it always brings a positive influence on mood and outlook on life. Being around others doesn't mean you have to talk to them about your feelings, it can be any amount of conversation you can muster. Simply being in the presence of others is regulating.
There's a running joke at the office that says what the best way to regulate a dysregulated therapist? Put a client in front of them. Sometimes it's just being in the presence of others, listening, supporting if needed. There are positive effects to both the person receiving and the person giving support.
Self compassion is the other tool
Low mood and being hard on yourself goes hand in hand. It’s easy to tell yourself to stop being so hard on yourself, but how do you actually do that? What I have found helpful is to look at a picture of myself as a child, or you can just imagine yourself as a child, and practice speaking to them, as if you are a nurturing and supportive parent, coach or friend. If you don’t know where to start on what to say, think about what you would say to another small child who is feeling the same feelings you are.
This is a strangely powerful tool in changing your mood and how you feel about yourself. I read a quote the other day that said “if you want a man to get off the ground, you have to stop beating him” and it reminded me we have to use kindness to help ourselves feel better and get back up.
Often in periods of stress or low mood we don’t show up how we want to at home, at work, in our relationships and this can cause a lot of shame, causing us to show up even worse.
We can’t turn something we aren’t proud of into a learning experience any other way. Recognizing that imperfections is part of humanity, learning to show up differently starts with self compassion and forgiving yourself.
Remember your humanness..... everyone struggles at times, mood fluctuations are very normal. Everyone is cranky and short with the people they love at times. Everyone makes mistakes, big and small; this is part of being a "card carrying member of the human race".
We aren’t taught as children how to handle mistakes, disappointment and failure but it is a key skill to learn and teach our children.
Try to embrace this in yourself so you can develop some resilience to shame and low mood, so you can dust yourself and get back up.
~ Laura, Clinical Therapist
Call (506) 651-1239 or BOOK ONLINE
